It was real- and I had to doubt it. The passion that we shared was unbreakable. It makes me sad to reread these confessions of love and lust and to sit here knowing what I now know and see that what we had was amazing...and to face the sad reality that I will never have a love like this again.
We are no longer the innocent beings we once were- carefree about proclaiming our feelings for one another. Feelings hide in the shadows now- feelings for anything. We must be numb.
Why did nobody warn me that your first love IS the true love and after that expires we must settle for someone who doesn't quite compare but is close enough. This new fellow makes me laugh, makes me smile, makes me feel safe just like my first love...but... somehow its not the same. Why?
It baffles me how the human mind and heart can fall so madly in love- can't imagine life without one another-promise to never change..and then they do. And time goes on and people move on and the love is gone. HOW!? We said forever...I know it happens to everyone (or most people have a similar experience) but why do we do this?
I suppose the French were right when they said, "Love makes the time pass and time makes the love pass"
The love is still there- in the form of pen strokes and buried memories of times where forever did exist. I did believe it. I do believe it. But I let it go for something new - why isn't love refundable?
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