The Truth About Guilt Trips

Guilt trips might just be the greatest torture device ever invented. And my mother knows it. Several months ago, in an effort to save a few pennies (Yes I may be fabulous, but I'm a bargain hunter 'till the end!) I decided to purchase my flight tickets home for the Christmas holiday. I had spoken to my mother several times regarding the fact I would likely only see her and her new husband for a few hours on Christmas Day and she assured me it would be fine and that she would be busy with his family anyway. LIES!

Mother and I reconfirmed holiday plans the other night and needless to say, she's not okay with them anymore, and I don't know what to do about it. You see, holidays (Christmas especially) are a delicate juggle to please both sides of the parental unit. I'm sure many people struggle with this day. IT'S IMPOSSIBLE--and much too stressful these days when hey, I might have some plans of my own with boyfriend and his family. So I do the best I can and never quite please anyone it seems. Someone will inevitably have something to say to make me feel like a jerk. Don't you just love family?

My plan was to spend December 23-Christmas morning with Dad, step-monster and little brother. Little bro's birthday is the 23rd so I thought I would be a good sister and spend the day with him. Is that so wrong? He also happens to be turning 12, I know at that age Christmas really starts to lose its charm and wonderment so I want to see his last Christmas morning as a quote, unquote; child. Plus the fact I can't even remember the last Christmas I spent with them as I refused to leave my Mother alone on Christmas 'morn so I figured it was their turn. Mom's remarried now, so she won't be alone. I'm free to make plans how I see fit...oh, I was so wrong.

Unfortunately my flight home is on Christmas Day. I did this to also see boyfriend so he wouldn't be alone all Christmas. This leaves me 3-4 hours to see Mom and she's not pleased. She's getting, "The short end of the stick like usual and bah-humbugged, and, why do they see you for three days and I get three hours? That's not fair. Can't you come on Christmas Eve?? Can't you stay longer??"

A. My tickets are booked, it costs $100 to change my flight plans and the flights are full. Plus, like I said, I'm cheap.
B. Her wedding anniversary is the day after Christmas, I don't want to be in their way or watch them be lovey dovey while boyfriend sits alone on Christmas! EW!
C. F-M-L.

This is the woman who last year got married the DAY AFTER Christmas. I was at her beck and call that whole week and not able to even enjoy a moment of my holiday, infact I clearly recall saying, "I'm not doing Christmas next year its too stressful for me." But here I am, buying plane tickets and taking vacation days from work and listening to gripes about how I'm not doing enough.



I booked a trip home for the holidays but missed the small print that said, "FREE GUILT TRIP INCLUDED".